i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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