He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
is it fun? or sober?
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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