Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
