Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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