Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
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