Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
