so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
