3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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