Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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