I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Randomize
