It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Randomize
