Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
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