Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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