fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Randomize
