Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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