Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
