As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
try to milk me bitch
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
