New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
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