Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
