I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize
