It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
