Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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