Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
