i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
