Kareoke will never be a sober sport
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize
