No awkward lesbian experiences without me
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
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