I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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