how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
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