My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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