i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
