That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
