And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Randomize
