Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
