If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
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