just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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