so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize