found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
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