I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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