I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I just had sex on a roof
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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