Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Holy shit dude........stairs
I have post one night stand depression
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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