Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
I love having hate sex.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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