don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
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