Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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