do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Randomize
