Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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