i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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