paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
