Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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