First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize