4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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