so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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