dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
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